"I have a big nose" | STFO 🀘


Bonjour bonjour Reader,

I got an interesting reply from yesterday's email about Lilas Louise's grey hair. I am going to let you read it first:

Not sure you are willing to offer free advice, so I understand if this email goes unanswered.
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I have a big nose. It's the one feature people notice about me right away.
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Adults generally don't comment on it, but I know behind closed doors, I can imagine conversations like:
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Rick: "You mentioned [redacted]. Who is he?"
Suzie: "You know, [redacted]. The guy with the big nose."
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Boom. STFO, right?
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I've never leaned into it, but been considering now that I'm a consultant. Like, my nose knows kind of thing.
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But I feel like this feature makes me more of a caricature rather than a professional. Your Bonjour, Bonjour and French accent feels cool. Lila's grey hair is distinct and dignified. Leaning into my nose size has me wondering if I'll look like a clown doing so.
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Any initial thoughts?

OK, first, an observation...

It's funny how everyone else's distinctive traits are "cool" or "dignified." But when it's our own, it's a "caricature" that would make us "look like a clown."

It reminded me of this comment from an Italian marketer under one of my posts:

"I spent years trying to minimize my Italian accent, and then I got it: I'll never win against my own story. I was born and raised in Italy, and even if now I feel more like a Berliner, I will not cancel 20 years of Italian culture within me."

It's a powerful thought, isn't it?

β€œI’ll never win against my own story.”

A little too on the nose, even.

Anyway. Here's my free advice to the guy with the big schnozzle.

Trying to fight against your own story is so f*cking exhausting. I've tried it. It takes a toll on you after a while.

There are millions of ways to use your nose size as a distinctive brand asset without looking like a clown. It can be very subtle at first. For example, you can mention it in passing on LinkedIn and see what it feels like. Then you can up the antes and talk about it even more. And then do it again. And again. And again. Until it feels normal.

Pay attention to what others notice when you do this. What makes them laugh? What do they ignore? Maybe it's going to be all the self-deprecating jokes you make about it. Maybe it's a profile picture that makes your snout look even bigger than it is.

Whatever it is, channel your energy to develop this distinctive asset instead of fighting against it. Follow your nose, if you will.

Louis Grenier

A recovering Frenchman who helps marketers stand the f*ck out.

This was the Stand The F*ck Out (STFO) Daily Newsletter. One bite-size email [Mon-Fri] to learn to stand the f*ck out.

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